Good Enough

On psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott’s notion of “good enough” parenting:

But Winnicott recognized that adapting and readapting to a child’s ever-evolving needs for attention versus independence is no easy feat, and he reassured mothers that getting it perfect isn’t possible, nor is it the goal. In fact, as long as she’s usually reliable and her child is well-cared for, her “failures”—minor miscues and slip-ups—are par for the course. Being good enough (as opposed to perfect), he championed, ultimately fosters independence and autonomy in the growing child. He writes of the good-enough mother: “Her failure to adapt to every need of the child helps them adapt to external realities. Her imperfections better prepare them for an imperfect world.”

How many important things in life call for us to accept “good enough,” not out of a pathological need to settle, but because “overall love and consistency” with “inevitable blunders” not only is good enough, but describes all of us rather well?

Why good-enough parenting needs to be a movement